Merch Girl Read online

  I pouted. “Screw it.”

  He laughed. “Are you drunk?”

  “What? No. Why is everyone asking me that?”

  “She’s a lightweight, apparently,” Trina chimed in. “Don’t worry; I’ll keep an eye on her.”

  Logan nodded back at her.

  “I’ll find you later.” He placed his hands on my shoulders and squeezed them slightly.

  I watched him walk away. He was beginning to add a rockstar swagger to his step, and it was hot. He knew he ruled the room and I could tell he loved it. His face glowed with confidence, and he brushed his fingers through his glistening hair more times than I could count.

  Trina brought me a second drink.

  “Another one?” I asked, not sure if I could handle it.

  “Why not? We’re not driving anywhere, we don’t have to wake up early, and we’re in New York City!”

  I clinked my plastic cup to hers and took a sip; this one was stronger than the last.

  “And like I said before, I’m going to need as much alcohol in me as I can get if I’m going to talk to Griffin about everything later,” she said.

  “Why don’t you just wait until tomorrow? It’s already so late, and this is probably one of the best nights of his life, let’s not ruin it.”

  She thought about it for a moment and took a few more sips of her drink.

  “Yeah, you’re right. Let’s drink anyway!”

  Trina and I danced for what seemed like hours. I was so sweaty that my clothes felt like they were glued to my body. We let the boys enjoy the night without us as they schmoozed with the press and other fans. I’m sure Holly was ecstatic about that. We took a break from dancing and hung back by the bar to catch our breath and cool off. An arm grabbed around me from behind as I sipped on my third cocktail of the night.

  “Hey, sexy,” the voice growled in my ear. My face felt hotter than it already was and despite the amount of alcohol I had already consumed, a ball of nerves still formed in the pit of my stomach.

  It was Logan again, and now that I felt more uninhibited, I grabbed at his t-shirt and pulled him closer to me. I stopped when I remembered I wasn’t allowed to kiss him in public.

  “I’m taking this dancing queen away,” he said to Trina. “Griffin and Ryan are gonna crash on your bus tonight.”

  “Oh, gotcha,” she said, winking.

  My heart raced. I was scared and excited at the same time. Logan kept his arm around me and helped me walk to the club’s exit. I was only swaying a little bit, I think. He was sweaty too, and in an odd way that turned me on even more.

  He looked outside before leaving. “There are still some people out there. Can you make it on your own for a little bit? I’m sorry, I hope you understand.”

  I nodded, but I was upset that my knight in shining armor had to ditch me when people were around. I could handle it though; I just needed to walk a little slower than usual to make sure I didn’t tip over. I followed him out of the club, keeping a few feet between us. At least he helped me into the bus when we got to the end of the curb. It was eerily quiet in there. No one was around except for the driver.

  Before I had a chance to think about what was happening, Logan picked me up over his shoulder and threw me down playfully on the couch in the back. He turned on the stereo, found a good rock station, and kicked off his shoes. I stared at him in awe, taking in his beauty. I was still in shock that someone this gorgeous would want to be with me.

  His hands grabbed my face as he leaned in towards me. It was a deep kiss, and his tongue swirled around my mouth, giving me goose bumps all over my body. I ran my hands through his soft hair and pushed him down on the couch.

  “I want you so bad,” he said, breathing deeply in my ear.

  I tore his tight, sweaty t-shirt off as fast as I could, and traced my fingers around the outlines of his chest muscles. I was surprised to find such a chiseled physique on such a seemingly thin guy. I kissed him again, biting his lip. He reversed our positions, throwing me down this time.

  “Your turn,” he said, pulling my shirt over my head. We started kissing again, and it hit me, I was hooking up with one of the biggest rockstars in the country right now. He was mine, and he wanted me. He chose me. It was so insane and surreal. I closed my eyes and forced my racing mind to shut down, leaving my body on auto-pilot.

  Chapter 10 – Philadelphia

  I rubbed my hand soothingly against my throbbing forehead. I’d never experienced a hangover before, but I guessed this was what it felt like. I opened my eyes slowly and saw the low ceiling above me and the curtain hanging by my side. Strange, I had no recollection of getting into a bunk. I cautiously pulled the curtain back and poked my head out to find an empty hallway.

  I maneuvered my way out of the bunk and realized I was only wearing Logan’s t-shirt and my underwear. His soft cotton tee felt nice against my skin, and still smelled like him. I breathed in the scent, which brought a rush of memories from last night back into my mind. Good memories, really, really good memories.

  I found my clothes crumpled on the floor in the back of the bus and put my shorts and shoes back on. I grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket and saw it was already one in the afternoon. I dialed Trina’s number.

  “Well good morning miss rockstar lover,” she said. “Just get up?”

  “Uh huh,” I responded. “Do you have any Advil?”

  “Yes, drunky,” she joked. “Come outside, I’ll meet you there.”

  “Okay,” I replied, and hung up.

  My throat was dry, but all the guys had in their fridge was Gatorade and Red Bull, gross. I stepped outside the bus and squinted in the bright daylight, looking around the unfamiliar street. I saw Lansdowne’s name on the theater’s marquee in big block letters. I guess we were skipping a hotel today.

  Trina ran out of the theater and crossed the street, her long hair was perfectly tousled and her large sunglasses framed her face impeccably; she was the epitome of a rockstar’s girlfriend. I looked down at myself in last night’s clothes and felt my greasy, messy hair.

  “Tell me everything!” she screamed, swinging me around. “You kinda stink though.”

  “I feel pretty gross too,” I replied.

  “I washed my hair in the sink and doused myself in body spray and Febreeze,” she said.

  “I’ll follow your lead.”

  We climbed onto our bus and Trina hovered over me as I tipped my head under the faucet. “Okay, okay, I’ll tell you what happened!”

  She handed me some shampoo and leaned against the door frame, listening intently.

  “Well, we started kissing, and his shirt came off, then my shirt came off…” My face flushed just thinking about it. “We didn’t do everything, but, his body is insane. When I close my eyes it’s all I can see. I don’t know how I’m going to function like a normal person around him now!”

  “I’m so happy for you!” she said, handing me the conditioner. “You guys are so cute together.”

  “Really? You think so?”

  She nodded.

  I rinsed out my hair and grabbed a wash cloth to rinse my face and some of my body. I wanted to feel clean, but I also loved knowing Logan’s sweat and kisses were all over me. I doused myself with body spray and grabbed a bottle of water, the Advil and a granola bar before leaving the bus. The venue in Philly was a large, old theater. It seriously looked like it could fall apart at any minute, kind of scary, but cool.

  We entered the theater and saw the guys settling in for soundcheck. They waved to us and we watched them tune their instruments and check their microphones. Jenna snuck up next to us as they began to play some songs. I tried to ignore her, but it was clear that she wasn’t going away until one of asked her what she wanted.

  I gave in. “What’s your deal?”

  She waved her phone around in front of us. “I have something you might want to see.”

  She shoved her phone in our faces and showed us pictures she took from last night’s pa
rty. The photos showed me and Logan hugging on the dance floor, and him helping me into the tour bus with his hands around my waist.

  “What? Are you stalking us now?” I asked.

  “As long as I have these pictures, you have to do whatever I want,” she answered. “Or else these go up on the web for the whole world to see.”

  I had enough of this blackmail crap. This was going to end, tonight. My stomach burned with rage as I ran up to the stage.

  “What are you doing?” Trina asked, running after me. She caught my arm and pulled me back.

  “I’m not letting her ruin our lives anymore,” I said.

  I think she saw the determination in my eyes, and I knew she wanted this whole ordeal to come to an end as well. She knew it had to be done so she let go of my arm and walked with me to the stage.

  Logan came to the edge and sat down in front of me. “What’s up?”

  “I need to talk to Ryan.”

  “About what?” he asked.

  “I just need to talk to him,” I responded.

  He shrugged his shoulders and waved Ryan over. I turned around to find Jenna. She was in the back of the theater with Jeff. I wondered if she thought I had the guts to actually tell Ryan what was happening.

  Ryan met me at the front of the stage, and I didn’t know how to start. My mind went blank and my heart beat fast. I was about to ruin his relationship with someone he seemed to care so deeply for. I knew I was doing the right thing, but that didn’t make it any easier. I nervously ran my fingers through my wet hair and looked at Trina for guidance.

  “What’s wrong?” Logan asked, placing his hand on my shoulder.

  “Um, I’m not really sure how to say this,” I said, glancing up at Ryan quickly. “But, your girlfriend isn’t being honest with you.”

  Ryan looked at Logan, but he didn’t seem to know what was going on either.

  “What do you mean?” he asked.

  “Jenna’s cheating on you,” I blurted out. There, I said it. A one-hundred pound weight was immediately lifted off my chest.

  “What?” he asked. “I don’t think so.”

  “It’s true, we sort of caught her the other night,” Trina added.

  “I don’t believe you guys, you’ve always hated Jenna, you’re just trying to get me to kick her off the tour,” he said.

  Logan put his arm in front of Ryan, and pushed him back away from us. “Hey man, don’t call my girlfriend a liar.”

  Girlfriend? Oh my God, he called me his girlfriend!

  I was joyful for a split second, until all hell broke loose. Ryan stood up with his fists clenched and stepped towards Logan. They glared at each other and I was scared someone would throw a punch. Thankfully, Griffin noticed the commotion and jumped up from his drum set. He stood in the middle of Logan and Ryan, keeping them a safe distance away from each other.

  “What the hell is going on?” Griffin asked.

  “These two are causing trouble,” Ryan said, pointing at us. Now Griffin looked just as pissed off as Logan did.

  “Please explain,” Griffin said.

  “We told Ryan that Jenna’s cheating on him,” Trina said matter-of-factly, her hands firmly placed on her hips.

  Griffin’s eyebrows rose, he seemed genuinely shocked that we knew about it too.

  He placed a hand on Ryan’s shoulder. “I didn’t want you to find out like this, but, it’s true,” he said, softly. “I’m really sorry, man.”

  Ryan threw Griffin’s hand off of him. “What?”

  “I caught her hooking up with Jeff the other night. I was going to tell you privately, later,” he explained. “I had no idea the girls knew.”

  Ryan’s eyes darted around the theater and stopped when he spotted Jenna and Jeff in the back. He leapt off the stage and ran towards them with a look of madness in his eyes.

  “Shit,” Griffin said, running after him. Logan followed, and Trina and I did too.

  “You’re a dead man!” Ryan screamed.

  Jeff turned and ran. What a coward. Jenna chased after them, crying out for them to stop.

  “Nothing happened!” she yelled, pulling at Ryan’s shirt. “Those bitches are lying!”

  Ryan stopped in his tracks and turned to face Jenna. Griffin, Logan, Trina and I surrounded them in the middle of the theater lobby. It was an extremely awkward situation to be in. Not only had I just let this poor guy know his girlfriend’s been cheating, but now we had to witness their break-up.

  “Jenna, I may not have believed the girls, but Griffin wouldn’t lie. He wouldn’t make shit up, he’s like a brother to me, and I trust him a hundred percent. If he says he saw you and Jeff together, then, I guess…”

  He looked down at the ground and didn’t finish his sentence. Tears began to fall from Jenna’s eyes, I’m sure she had to force them out. Or maybe she was just sad that she got busted.

  “I need you to leave,” he said, lifting his head to face her. “And make sure Jeff leaves too.”

  Jeff wasn’t in the theater anymore. I guess he was smart enough to already take off.

  “You’ll regret this,” Jenna said. I don’t know if she was saying that to me, or to Ryan, but as she shoved her way through us she shot Trina and me a nasty look. I wanted to spit on her or yank on her hair as she walked by, but I decided to be the better person.

  I turned to Ryan. “I’m so sorry, I…”

  Before I could finish my sentence, Ryan ran off backstage. Logan and Griffin followed after him.

  I wasn’t sure whether to smile or cry. “We should feel happy, right?”

  “Yeah…” Trina responded.

  “Then why do I feel like we single handedly ruined the tour, the band, my relationship, and basically everything in life?”

  “I hear ya,” Trina said. “Let’s just go set up the merch booth and leave the guys alone for a bit.”

  “Good idea.”

  We walked through the theater doors to grab the boxes from the bus.

  Devin stopped us as soon as we got outside. “Did you just tell Ryan what I think you told him?” she asked, beaming.

  “What are you talking about?” Trina asked.

  “Jenna just ran out looking really upset and went straight to the bus,” she explained. “Then I saw her and Jeff come out with a bunch of bags and they got in a cab.”

  “Yes, I told him, are you happy now?” I said, hoping to shut her up. “Don’t you dare tell a soul what you know.”

  She nodded and zipped her lips.

  We grabbed the boxes and brought them back inside the theater to set up for the night. Robyn yelled into her two-way radio with a sour look on her face. She saw us unloading the merch and came over to our table.

  “I don’t want to know what happened, just make sure those boys get on stage and perform tonight, got it?” she snapped.

  We nodded and she walked away, going off into her two-way again. I sat down on top of one of the merch boxes and held my head in my hands. I managed to piss everyone off in under an hour. I’m sure the band hated me, and Trina probably wasn’t too thrilled now that Griffin knew she was hiding a secret like this from him.

  “I shouldn’t have said anything. I should have waited,” I said.

  “No, you did the right thing, and it had to happen sometime. There was never going to be a perfect moment,” Trina reassured me.

  “I’m gonna go find the guys and see if they’re okay,” I told her. “Wanna come?”

  “No, I don’t really want to face Griffin right now.”

  I gave her a quick hug before heading backstage.

  Logan, Griffin and Ryan were still shouting at each other, and the noise echoed down the hallway. I stopped outside the dressing room, too afraid to face them all. The yelling finally stopped after a few minutes and Logan exited the room, slamming the door behind him.

  He jumped back against the door when he saw me. “I wasn’t expecting you to be out here.”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  He paced ba
ck and forth down the hall. “I can’t talk right now, need to think.”

  “Okay.”

  He took small steps down the confined hallway, tugging at the ends of his hair and looking down at the floor as he walked. I ruined his band, I hid a secret from him, and now he was going to break up with me, I just knew it. I felt trapped under the low ceiling, and the stuffiness of the old theater was suffocating. I messed up, and I couldn’t hold back my tears any longer. I tried to hide it from him, but he could hear me sniffling.

  “Why are you crying?” he asked.

  “It’s all my fault, I’m so sorry, she was blackmailing me with pictures from last night, and I didn’t know what else to do,” I said between sobs.

  “Lacey,” he said, wiping the tears from my face with his thumbs. “It’s not your fault. Jenna’s the one who did wrong here, you just had the guts to tell him about it, and I’m glad you did.”

  “Really? Then what’s all the fighting about then?”

  “Ryan’s mad that Griffin didn’t tell him sooner, and I’m sure he’s embarrassed about the whole situation too.”

  “Do you think they’ll still go on stage tonight?”

  “They don’t have a choice.”

  I felt better knowing that I didn’t break up the band, and that Logan wasn’t angry with me. I really wanted to bring up how he called me his girlfriend earlier, but was too afraid to mention it.

  “I better get back to work, doors are going to open soon,” I told him. “Good luck tonight.”

  I gave him a kiss and he wrapped his arms around me, holding me close.

  “You wouldn’t cheat on me, right?” he asked.

  “Never, you’re my one and only rockstar.”

  “Good,” he said, and let me go.

  I joined Trina back at the merch booth and let her know what was going on.

  “Griffin is not going to be happy with me,” she said. “Ugh, why didn’t I just tell him that I knew?”

  “It will all work out,” I said.

  The doors opened and we watched the fans run into the theater. I hoped the crowd wouldn’t notice any tension between the guys.

  Trina and I sold some t-shirts and posters, but we didn’t talk too much to each other. I needed her and Griffin to be alright; she’d never forgive me and I’d never forgive myself if I broke them up.